Est. sometime, probably

We import. We export.
What we do… sort of.

Vandelay Industries brings stuff to you, wherever here may be.

See Our Products Who We Are

Global Reach  •  Vague Mission  •  Impeccable Suit

A Company of Substance

Vandelay Industries is a premier import/export firm operating across multiple time zones, one of which we have never confirmed. Here is what we do know:

Operations

Importing

We import goods from abroad. The goods arrive. That part is true.

Operations

Exporting

We export goods abroad. Where, exactly? The paperwork says “somewhere.”

Strategy

Vagueness, Deployed

Our exact business model is protected. Not by law — by plausibility.

Culture

Suit-First Philosophy

We believe you don't have to be doing much to look like you are doing a lot.